When it comes to my writing, one of the biggest obstacles I face happens well before I put pen to paper. It’s that little voice that makes an appearance every time my brain fires up. That nasty, shrill voice that chatters in my ear, listing all the reasons I can’t write today. As the list goes on and on, the flood gates open, and I find myself drowning in that way too familiar sensation – guilt.
Guilt is not unique to writers. Many of us are familiar with guilt, and have felt that squirm in the stomach at least once in their lives. Writers guilt, however, seems to be a pretty common affliction. Several of my wordsmith companions have shared with me their own struggles. With dishes to be done, garbage to put out and meetings to prep for, only a complete ass would waste time working on a novel. Right?
So here’s my attempt to impart wisdom. Things that have helped me get over my writers guilt, and thing that hopefully can help others overcome them as well. Because the world always needs more storytellers.
BE REALISTIC
Are you able to write 24 hours a day, seven days a week? As much as we’d like to, you can’t dedicate every waking moment to your writing. Writing is a mentally exhausting process, and burnout happens to even the best of us. Therefore taking the time you need realistically won’t break the bank. Morning, evening, on your lunch break - whenever you feel your creative juices flowing, allow yourself to drop everything and focus, even if it’s just for half an hour. Those chores will still be there when you’re done, and you’ll still have plenty of time left in the day for things like cooking dinner and sleeping.
TALK TO YOUR FAMILY
It’s important your family understands why writing is important to you. Not everyone wants to be a writer, but most people understand what it’s like to have a dream. I was surprised when I spoke to my partner, a mathematician, and he said he thinks writing a novel is a perfectly legitimate project. Don’t be afraid to also ask your family for help. Anything from watching the kids for a few hours a week, to becoming a private cheer squad can make a big difference. Make sure you compromise though – is there something they are passionate about but aren’t prioritising? Agreeing to help each other pursue your passions is a win for all involved.
FOCUS ON YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS
At the end of your writing time, note down your achievements. Try not to focus on your shortcomings, instead focus on what you have created. This time of reflection each day lets you see how far you’ve come. Writing isn’t easy, especially when you’re just starting out. Authors who can finish a manuscript in just one month have years of experience under their belts. Let yourself feel proud of what you have created. After all, every word is one step closer to a finished book!
SUPPORT OTHER WRITERS
Would you tell another writer to stop what they were doing? To spend less time on their work? If you validate other writers, it becomes easier to validate your own work. You may even help others through doubts just like your own. Writing is a solo endeavour, and it’s easy to forget that there are thousands of others riding the same emotional roller coaster every day. Writers meet-ups, online chat rooms and writers festivals are a great place to connect with other writers.
UNDERSTAND YOUR EMOTIONS
What is hiding underneath your guilt? Is it fear of rejection? Jealousy of others success? A first grade teacher who told you writers were a drain on society? There are a lot of negative stereotypes around the creative arts that can make us feel like we are wasting our time. Talk to other writers, to your loved ones, even to trained professionals about your struggles. Fighting your emotions day in and day out leaves little energy to be creative. Discovering the source of your guilt can help you break those chains, and free you to focus on what you love - writing.
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